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Plastic surgery generally refers to medical operations that mold or shape human features for esthetic or functional purposes. Contrary to what the name may indicate, plastic surgery has nothing to do with modern plastics. In this context, "plastic" is based on the Greek word "plastikos" which means to shape or to mold. Among the most common plastic surgery procedures are the following: The ABDOMINOPLASTY, more popularly known as the tummy tuck, removes excess fat from the stomach which serves to flatten and tighten the abdomen. The procedure takes two to five hours and patients can be back in circulation after two to four weeks. Common side effects include temporary pain, numbness, soreness and swelling. BREAST ENLARGEMENT is a procedure that involves the insertion of inflatable saline implants into the breasts to enhance their size. The operation takes only one or two hours and the patient is back on his feet after a few days, although the breasts remain overly sensitive to touch for three to four weeks. Common side effects include temporary soreness and swelling, change in nipple sensation and bruising. If breast enlargement is concerned with size, a BREAST LIFT is concerned with shape and is undertaken mainly to raise sagging breasts through the removal of excess skin and sculpting of the nipples and tissues. It is a one to three-hour long operations that sometimes leaves scars that heal after several months to a year or remain permanently. Patients are often back to work i a week or so. A CHEMICAL PEEL restores wrinkled or blemished skin by peeling away the top players of the skin with the use of a chemical solution. Although this is usually an outpatient procedure, a full-face phenol peel requires a one or two-day admission. Among the side effects are acute sensitivity to the sun as well as permanent lightening of the treated area and permanent loss of the ability to tan. COLLAGEN INJECTIONS, also known as fat injections, are used to plump up facial skin that has sunk due to age as well as to add fullness to the lips. It is a simple operation that can take 15 minutes to an hour and recovery is almost immediate. DERMABRASION is a scraping procedure aimed at removing facial scars or wrinkles by scraping the top layers of skin with the use of a high-speed rotary wheel. It only takes a few minutes and patients can go back to work in a few weeks. Side effects include an acute sensitivity to the sun and the loss of ability to tan. free penis enargement tip vimax penis enlargement forum vigrx pill cheap penis enhancement pills enlargment forum free matter penis size cheap penis elargement pills natural penile enlargement exercise penis enlagement without pills

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I really don’t know how to say this any other way. My dog decided to talk to me the other night and he had a lot to say. It initially played like any other night really. Once again, I was tossing and turning, in and out of sleep. I was half awake, mulling over my job situation: I want to make money writing but I need an income more. Then the most bizarre thing happened. “Hey human Bob! This is your best friend speaking! Wake up!” Who the hell was that? It was a deep, low voice; strong and certain with a hint of a bourbon induced slur. Sounded like Dean Martin actually. I immediately sat up. It was pitch black. The radio clock blurred 3:53 in a dull crimson light. All I could make out was the shadowy outline of Parker, my trusty beagle, sitting upright at my feet. “Hey boy, did you hear that?” I whispered instinctively. “Someone’s in the house.” My vision was starting to warm up to the darkness. Parker just stared back at me, his head tilted, his long ears hanging to the side of his head like hand towels on a wall. He turned his head to the bedroom doorway, lifted his nose to the night and sniffed. He turned back to face me. “Don’t think so.” I swore Parker spoke but it couldn’t be. I mean his hound drawn lips seemed to move to the words I heard but that was impossible. “Who’s there?” I yelled into the night. “Whoever it is, I am warning you that I am at this moment retrieving my loaded double-barrel twelve gauge from under the bed. I will shoot you. So leave now and I want to hear the door slam behind you.” I made some dumb noises in a lame attempt to fool the intruder into believing what I had just proclaimed. I took the ruse to the next level. “Okay. I’m fully armed and about to call 911 from my fully powered cell phone. Oh yeah, strong signal, four bars. Oh yeah, this is going to be a very clear 911 call.” “You’re breaking me up. Put the phone down human Bob.” It was Parker talking. I was certain of it. Nah, it had to be a sick trick. “Okay, good one Steve. You wired up the dog with a little speaker. Very funny.” My brother Steve was known to go to great lengths to pull off pranks. But I was pretty sure he was at his apartment in the city, sixty miles away, God knows doing what, and at 48 years old, unlikely to suddenly bother me with a prank—it had been 25 years since his last one. But the mind scrambles to the most implausible scenarios when so duly challenged. “Don’t think so. Nope it’s me, Parker,” the dog mumbled. I was positive he spoke again. By now I was sitting straight up, leaning towards him. He just sat there and looked at me with those big dark eyes. His poker face was on. “Parker? Are you talking to me?” “Well I’m not talking to myself.” I leaned back against the headboard. He yawned. “This can’t be. I’ve got to stop watching Animal Planet.” “Listen, I’ve got something to say and I’m not sure how long this talking stuff is going to work so …” “You are talking!” I interrupted incredulously. “Should you want I bow wow?” “Holy cow! Parker you are talking.” “Yup. But I’m not sure for how long. So can I say a few things before …” “I can’t believe this.” “Yeah I know. Either can I but if you don’t mind.” I looked at him with a giant smile plastered across my face. Parker can talk. The dog was talking. Who was I kidding? It had to be a prank. He continued. “I’ve been listening to a lot of that talk radio and that C-SPAN channel you watch while you write. I’m here to tell ya I don’t like what I’m hearing.” “You’re kidding me right?” “Afraid not.” Oh this was good. I was really hallucinating. Talk-shmalk, I had a few nagging questions of my own. “Hey, can I ask you something before you get to your stuff?” “Make it quick. I haven’t got all night.” “You like smell things a hundred times more than we do, right?” “Four hundred.” “Okay, four hundred. Wow! Then I really wonder about this.” “Yeah I know. Why do we like to sniff every morsel of excrement or yellow patch of urine we encounter on our walks?” “Now that you bring it up, yeah, why? It must smell like the inside of Dick Cheney’s or Ted Kennedy’s septic tank? And you know how much crap they’re filled with.” “That was a funny one human Bob. But it isn’t like what you smell. We pick up a lot more notes. It’s a broader pallet if you will. We don’t smell stink. We smell identity, mood, and illness. For instance, you know that crazy cairn terrier down the street?” “Yeah.” “She has stomach cancer and her humans don’t have a clue.” “You are kidding me?” “She probably has less than six months if they don’t get her to a vet soon.” He paused to lick his right front paw. “Yeah, and another thing. Don’t take me out at nights for awhile.” “Why?” “Cause there is a rabid possum living under the porch. That’s why.” “You know this from the smell of possum poop?” “Excrement.” “Whatever.” “Yup.” Parker yawned as if bored. “So is that it? Can I say what I need to say?” “Well there is that thing you do with that licking your, you know, your …” “Penis?” “Well, yeah.” “Jealous are we?” “Well, it’s just that …” “It’s all about keeping clean. Nothing pleasurable if that’s what you’re driving at. Nothing like what you do with your hand. By the way, I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t pet me afterwards. Nope, no pleasure; it’s all business. You made sure of that when you had me “fixed”, remember. Thank you very much.” “Oh yeah, sorry about that. I had no idea you knew any different.” “No idea my butt. I’ll ‘no idea’ ya.” He paused again to lick his right paw again and then continued. “But I don’t hold it against you. We don’t hold grudges. Heck, if we did, we would have mauled most humans dead by now. Which brings me to why I am talking to you.” “No grudges. Really? I mean that “fixing” stuff is pretty serious. That’s pretty good if that doesn’t bother you.” “You done? Can I get to my concern?” “Sure. Sorry. Go ahead.” “How can humans be so smart supposedly, while they single handedly are destroying the Earth?” “You mean global warming?” “It’s more than that. It’s the air. It’s the water. It’s the dirt. It’s the forests. It’s the killing. It’s the anger. It’s the hate. It’s the grudges. It’s the fear. It’s everything.” “Oh come on. You’re being a little dramatic.” “We don’t know dramatic.” “Well give me examples of what you mean.” “First of all, the air is filled with danger. Dogs, cats, birds, animals of all kinds can smell it. It is our biggest topic when we get together.” “I don’t smell a thing.” “Yeah, that’s part of the problem. And you can’t taste the troubled water either.” “Scientists don’t seem to be complaining. So I should be listening to a dog?” “We have no agenda. Dogs call it as they smell it.” “ ‘call it as they smell it’; I’m suppose to just accept that?” “Yeah, there is a lot you should just accept.” “Oh yeah, like what else?” “Well, and here is what I think is the crux of the problem, you keep choosing the wrong alpha humans.” “What?” “You’ve got this alpha thing all wrong. Just because animals order their packs based on physical size and strength doesn’t make it so for humans. We do it because we are simple. You do it because you are thoughtless. That’s what we, and I think it is fair to say I am speaking for all animals, don’t get. Humans are able to think things through. But they never do. Well, that’s not completely true; some have but they are mocked or marginalized. An alpha dog barks and gets all puffy, like that wacky shepherd Sarge from around the block. The worst he can do is break out of his electronic fence and charge one of us. But you humans take it up a notch.” “Can you give me a for instance?” “God there are so many. Let me see. Okay, you’ve elected a president who pounds his chest and walks around like a gorilla with its arms all out to the side, all tough and all, carrying on with ‘bring it on’. When he jumps the fence, he brings tanks and bombs and humans loaded down in weapons and in body armor. Meanwhile, you have alpha males all over the place, flexing their muscle in their packs, threatening to obtain nuclear weapons, the great equalizer, giving the president one excuse after another to hop the fence. It’s nuts. And I for one am telling you, you’ve got it all wrong.” “Well, I don’t know what to say.” “You don’t need to say anything. Just start picking the right alpha humans; humans whose visions see beyond fighting, whose hearts hold no grudges, whose thoughts and reasons are not the products of testosterone, whose collective knowledge is rooted in the concept that true peace is never the consequence of war but the outcome of constant learning, negotiating and adjusting.” “This is what you want to tell me? Nothin’ for nothin’ but it’s a little heavy for a little chat with a dog at 3:30 in the morning.” “In a nut shell, yeah.” It was hard to accept this from my beagle. I mean, he’s a dog; a sleeping, eating, sniffing, crapping dog. I was chalking this whole episode up to stress. I was apparently snapping. “That’s it. I’m pretty much done. Just one last thing while I have the chance.” “What? World hunger? String theory?” I asked sarcastically. “You get the right alpha humans and the world hunger thing will take care of itself, smart ass. As far as string theory, who do you think I am, Hawking? I’m just a dog. No it’s more pedestrian than that, something I think you can manage.” “Then what, already?” I asked impatiently. “You know that thing you do occasionally where you empty the dish washer in the buff.” “Ummm … yeah I guess.” “Put some clothes on. It’s disturbing. I’m beggin’ ya, please!” “All right, but only if you lick your privates in private.” “I’ll see what I can do. No promises.” “So this is it? No more talking? You know we could make a fortune on Letterman with his stupid pet tricks.” “It’ll never happen. You see, this is a one time deal. Not sure why or how this is happening. Maybe that God guy is involved somehow. All I know is that when it is done, it is …” He abruptly stopped talking. “Parker?” Not a grunt. He yawned and as he did he stretched his front legs out and spread across the foot of the bed, his ears resting flat on the blanket. “Parker … are you done? Is that it?” He slowly closed his eyes and floated off to sleep. “Parker … just like that?” He began to twitch; in hot pursuit of a fox I imagined. “Holy smokes. I must be dreaming myself.” I curled back down under the safety of my covers, scratched my butt and thought about the conversation I had just had with Parker or myself or both. I sniffed the air. It smelled fine to me. What the heck was he talking about, ‘danger in the air’? It had to be a dream. As I drifted off to sleep, I thought about getting a real job real soon, apparently this writing stuff was getting the best of me. I also made a point to remember to talk to the owners of that crazy cairn terrier. I thought it was the least I could do. 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Given the large variations in human penis sizes, discord and dissatisfaction with one's self are unavoidable. The longest erect penis recorded during the famous Kinsey surveys was a shocking ten inches. That is nothing compared to the 12" and 14" behemoths reported in "L'Ethnologie du Sens Genitale", and in Dr. David Reuben's "Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex", respectively. If that makes you want to cry, wait till you hear the good news - the shortest functioning erect penis measurement according to the Kinsey survey was 1 inch. There are, however, some reports in medical literature of penises that do not extend beyond 1 cm. when fully erect. Finally, just so you can know which side of the fence you are hanging from, a study by the Lifestyles Condom Co. indicated that the average erect length of a male sex organ is 5.877 inches. Women have often been reassuring towards their mates in this regard. "Size doesn't matter", they would say. Few men really believe that. In an online poll that asked if respondents felt that penis size makes a difference in a man's ability to sexually satisfy a partner, 46% of the respondents answered "Very much: Penis size makes a big difference in a man's ability to sexually satisfy a partner". Only 13% responded "Not at all: Penis size makes no difference in a man's ability to sexually satisfy a partner". The poll did not mention how many of the respondents were women and how many were men, but the fact is - men and women believe that size still does matter! In "The Beefcaking of America," (Psychology Today November/December 1994 issue) Jill Neimark reported the findings from a questionnaire completed by some 1500 male and female readers. The Neimark report suggests that a significant subset of women who are financially independent and rate themselves as physically attractive place a high value on male appearance. A small group unabashedly declared not only an rather unsurprising strong preference for better-looking men, they also indicated that they cared more about penis size, both width and length, than about the physical appearance of the man. Niemark's survey results also suggests that men believe their appearance has a larger impact on women than the majority of women actually acknowledge. Men indicated they feel their specific physical features, from hairline to penis size, strongly influence their personal acceptability by women. "Size does matter". Judging by the number of sites Google.com returns on a search for "penis enlargement", that seems to be a pretty popular opinion. As long as there are men out there running around with 14" monsters, the rest of the mortals will continue to judge themselves and pray at the altar of everything that grants bigger penises. The results of penis enlargement are not always pretty, considering the various methods that are purportedly effective. Claims range from the scientific to the outrageous, and some of them can be downright nasty. Unlike lizards, men do not have the power to regenerate lost appendages, so it is highly advisable to do a little research before fooling around with Mother Nature's precious gifts. The following is a list of some penis enlargement methods other than penis pills, followed by some general comments about each; Enlargement creams do nothing more than increase blood flow in the penis tissue. While this may definitely assist in erection firmness (Which will cause the penis to appear and feel larger), using creams cannot enlarge your penis. There is no known medical evidence too support the claim that topical preparations can do more than increase blood flow, unlike penis pills. Penis pumps create a vacuum and force blood to the penis tissue. According to Menstuff® Sexhealth columnist Dr. Williams, pumps are mainly used by men who suffer from chronic insulin dependent diabetes or circulatory disorders. They have such poor blood circulation overall that they cannot obtain proper blood flow in their penis area. By using a pump instead of penis pills, the skin and underlying tissues are stretched, allowing them to clamp off the blood flow and consequently trap it in the penis. With the clamp firmly in place, brief sexual encounters can occur. There is little medical evidence that penis pumps cause any actual permanent increase in the size of the penis. There is, however, bad news for "pumpers" out there - after using penis pumps over a period of time, some men claimed they were unable to get erections without the aid of a pump. This method of penis enlargement has been around for thousands of years. Weights are suspended from the penis to stretch it. With regular use, it can increase penis length - but at a price: It makes the penis thinner, and because of the stretched tissue, lessens the ability to achieve and maintain an erection. This method can also cause a decrease in blood circulation which can lead to serious problems including tissue damage. Penis enlargement surgery (or phalloplasty) is the Titanic of penis enlargement methods. It is huge, expensive and can end up being the worst disaster of your life. It can lead to serious complications like infection and scar tissue formation which can cause a misshapen penis. A well known horror story is that of Ron Nance, from Monterey, Calif., who claims that following his penis enlargement surgery he contracted a severe infection at the surgery site. He returned to his doctor, who re-sutured the incision. The complications persisted, and Nance claims he flew to Los Angeles a total of nine times for repairs before turning to other surgeons for help. Nearly two years later, with $20,000 invested in the operation and repairs, Nance states that he remains not only permanently scarred, but impotent. Other enlargement surgery patients have complained of disfigurement, shortening, loss of use of his penis, pain, swelling, excessive scarring, lumpiness, shrinkage, uneven surface with what appears to be cysts, and impotence. Many penis pills are nothing more than vitamin pills in disguise, and numerous men have been conned into popping them expecting more than what vitamins can deliver. Penis pill salesmen Michael A. Consoli, Vincent J. Passafiume, and several others have signed a consent agreement forfeiting approximately $35 million dollars in seized cash and property to settle charges that they had marketed penis enlargement pills with false claims. Operating as C.P. Direct, Inc., they claimed that their enlargement pill product "Longitude" would permanently enlarge the penis by 1-3 inches. They are not alone. 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The ingredients only tell half the story, the actual blending and quality of the ingredients also counts. This is somewhat more difficult to determine, however. In general most penis pills are quite safe because their ingredients are non-prescriptive, consisting mostly of natural herbs. However, you should always read the ingredients and consult a doctor before purchasing or taking them. Some supplements have stated that men with diabetes or genital nerve damage should avoid taking enlargement pills. Penis enlargement pills can be expensive. They usually cost anywhere between $40-$80 per month. If the product indicates that you need to take "booster pills", it is usually a bad sign. If the product manufacturer claims you can have a penis so large it will make a stallion turn green with envy, you can most likely be sure they are selling you bottled scam instead of penis pills. If the promise sounds too good to be true, then you can assume it is. Sincere supplements will tell it like it is: Results may and will vary from one individual to another. These can include stronger erections, increased sexual stamina, more intense orgasms, improvement in urinary flow, increased blood circulation to genital area, higher sex drive, increased sperm production and overall improvement in sexual function. Most penis pill programs offer a set of free exercises with their product. These should not be cast aside - they are vital key to your enlargement process. Do them religiously along with your supplement taking and you will NOT be disappointed. The penis inferiority complex has been documented for quite some time, and has no doubt existed since men started bathing and showering in full view of each other. Most men seem to feel their penis is small and are envious of someone else's member. This concern and dissatisfaction appears to stem from the cultural belief that larger penises give greater pleasure to women, and that women prefer a man with a huge penises. So can you pump up with penis pills? My answer is yes. Daily exercises and supplements together can increase the size of your penis. But to do so, you have to be smart, be aware, dedicated, and PLEASE be careful.